With sexual shame being so common it may seem surprising that we don’t talk about it more. Only it isn’t. Shame leads us to be silent about our sexuality and it gets more powerful in that silence. Whether you can live a life without any sexual shame or not, there are things we can all do to change our experience of sexual shame. For many of us this work is best done with a professional (either a general counselor or therapist or perhaps someone who specializes in sex therapy). In fact for some people, starting to unpack their sexual shame can be unsafe if they do it on their own, without any supports in place.

Sexual shame refers to are all the ways we come to feel that who we are as sexual beings (including how we think about sex, our sexual beliefs and values, our sexual desires, and our sexual behaviors) are wrong, broken, fundamentally bad, or even evil. People experience sexual shame in response to many things, including:

• who we feel sexual desire for
• who we want to have sex with
• the kinds of sex we want to have
• our sexual thoughts and fantasies
• the ways that we see ourselves as sexual (which often includes how we understand our gender)

Sometimes we all cut some corners to get what we want or need.  Want to stay home on a beautiful day after a long winter?  Call in sick.  Don

Sometimes we all cut some corners to get what we want or need.  Want to stay home on a beautiful day after a long winter?  Call in sick.  Don

Topics such as life-satisfaction and well-being are commonly considered in positive psychology and increasingly more in the mental health field. Measures of well-being offer the chance to uncover whether people are getting their overall needs met, and provide an overall sense of how happy, healthy, and prosperous someone is.

Here are a few ways to improve your psychological well being

self-acceptance
Self-growth
Purpose and meaning
Autonomy
Connectedness
Mastery

For more information about counseling and psychology, check out my site at RMarcAndrews.com

Therapy can be tricky. Before even walking in the door for their first appointment, many people already have a variety of preconceived notions. And these beliefs can become blocks in treatment, interfering with the therapeutic process.

For more information about counseling and psychology, check out my site at RMarcAndrews.com

Loneliness is not only emotionally painful; it can harm your health. It’s a risk factor for a host of problems: high blood pressure; sleep problems; decreased ability to deal with the stress of daily life; and the body’s reduced ability to handle inflammation, leading to conditions such as atherosclerosis, rheumatoid arthritis, and tendinitis, as well as a weakened immune system, so you’re more susceptible to illness. Researchers have yet to identify the exact ways these health problems occur, but they know that loneliness seems to make them worse.

How to cure loneliness

Get out and about. You don’t have to be best friends with someone to benefit from interaction. Amity Brown, who is separated from her husband, takes walks around her neighborhood, smiling at people she passes. “When I started getting to know the neighborhood and the people around me, I felt like part of a community,” she says.

Be selective about making friends. Hawkley points out that if you’re desperate for relationships, you may be willing to tolerate unacceptable treatment. Now that Brown is feeling more stable, she says, “I’m more careful when I choose my friends to make sure they’re low-drama.”

Stay positive. Lonely people tend to expect rejection, which makes it more likely to happen. Social cognitive therapy can help people reframe their thoughts about how others see them.

Here are some suggestions for experiencing more positive emotions and thus greater self-esteem.

1) Cultivate compassion
2) Let go of the past and stay present
3) Be kind to others
4) Build optimism

For more details go to the article and for more information about counseling and psychology, check out my site at RMarcAndrews.com